Condoms and Khisimusi in the Kingdom

We have obtained permission from the major grocery store (think King Soopers, but maybe 1/20^th the size, and 1/100^th the selection) and also permission from a smaller store to leave boxes of condoms for people to take, for free, and we have been regularly replenishing those locations with condoms we bring in our backpacks from PC headquarters in Mbabane (3 khumbi rides away), although now we're all out. Nompumelelo has wanted to distribute condoms and also demonstrate proper condom use at the town bar. The bar is dark, really noisy, and full of drunks most of the day, and is one of the few places here where I feel a little vulnerable. Nonetheless, we arranged with the owner to be allowed to visit with her customers this past Sunday afternoon, but they were watching a football game and there was no way we could be heard inside the bar, so we went to the picnic table outside and gave several demonstrations on our life-sized models of male and female genitalia of the proper installation and use of the male and female condoms. Some heavy kidding and loud interruptions from some of the more inebriated patrons, but the women (very few women were there) were closely attentive, especially when Katherine told them how much more vulnerable women are to HIV than men, because of anatomy and social norms. Then we went inside, where it was dark, noisy and crowded with maybe 70 men and maybe 8 women, and handed out free condoms till we ran out. The women really wanted the female condoms, but they are hard to get and we didn't have many. People don't like having their picture taken, so I did not photograph the demonstrations, but afterwords we bought a beer and went out to the tables outside, and were mostly courteously received. We viewed having this beer late afternoon with our new friends as finishing our week of library work (although we had a full morning of that left on Monday ) and starting the holiday festivities for us.

 

Doing these condom demonstrations in this bar was really hard. Few would have been brave enough to go to that bar and talk about use of condoms, much less pull out models of male and then female genitalia and shown how condoms are used. Some of the drunks were belligerent. Nomphumelelo handled them all with humor and grace , and got her point across, mostly. She really is extraordinary. Working and just living in this country has brought out in her skills and behavior barely hinted at in our 39 years together in the US. I am constantly in awe at what I'm seeing from her. Not just boldness, as at the bar, but quick thinking in remembering the names of many of the people we've met and what is of interest to each of them, and coming up with ingenious ways to move our projects here forward.

As we walked home in the golden light of the end of the afternoon several groups we passed asked for condoms. Initially I was a little dismayed thinking that we were now known in our community as the free condom couple, but on further review, it seemed OK.

We had believed Katherine would be just getting back now from a last visit with her father, and so we scheduled a quiet Christmas at this farm B&B near our site where we had stayed in September for one beautiful night. Katherine's December trip was however canceled when her father died so much more quickly than expected. When we booked this place we'd sent an invitation to the PCVs in our group if they wanted to join us at the “backpackers” part of this place (US$15/night, compared to $65/night in the separate “chalet”), but Christmas with people their parents' age didn't seem to appeal to them, and I think they wanted a little more action, so they all got together at a hostel closer to town, and also at a site in the mountains where they will cook and drink and sleep on the floor.

Here we are arriving at our B&B, loaded with computer, clothes for 3 days, and some gifts my thoughtful, clever and generous sister bought, wrapped and sent before Thanksgiving!

We assembled the small Christmas tree she had sent, to set the right tone, listening to the Nutcracke We had Christmas breakfast on the porch of our chalet

In the late afternoon I “braiied” (South African for grilled) our Christmas steak dinner, from cattle from the farm.

It was overcast and cool (60s, probably) Christmas day. Unfortunately the adjacent travel days were sunny and really hot. The store where we shopped to buy for our Christmas visit (these places are generally self-catering) was packed, check-out lines extending up the aisles to the back of the store – gridlock! We were really glad to get to our B&B and relax, swim, and cool off!

We try to catch the BBC South Africa 6:30 a.m. Broadcast on a shortwave radio Bob Keyser gave us, which we enjoy immensely. The 2^nd ½ of each broadcast is typically soccer and cricket. Imagine our surprise a few days ago to hear of Peyton Manning breaking the season passing record. But it said only that he played “American football,” and nothing was mentioned of the fortunes of his team; we assume the Broncos must have done well, with that much passing success. Not much ground game? Playoffs?

This posting and the previous one were, I know, kind of wordy. Sorry. No worries, there will not be a test. Just wanted to set the scene. Incwala and the bar were not much for photo ops. So I hope all of you had, as we say here, Khisimusi lomuhle (beautiful Christmas).